Weekly insights into our crazy world.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011



With the ceremony now officially a mere MONTH away, international news outlets like the DUNER BLOG are scrambling to deliver the latest dish on the year's most anticipated event. Wills and Kate have a wedding website, as well as Facebook and Twitter pages. Unfortunately, they're all about the cake designers, the historical wedding rings and hints that the dress might be designed by Alexander McQueen. They've also posted way too many cute baby photos of Kate. All of which is nice...but our readers want more. Let me speak for all bloggers when I shout: "C'mon, Clarence House spokesperson AMANDA FOSTER! Tell us who got invited and who didn't!!!"

Sorry, but the HOUSE OF WINDSOR is notoriously tight lipped about the GUEST LIST. So the only way for trusted news sources like the DUNER BLOG to find out who's in and who's out is when the invitees themselves share the news. And only a few lucky recipients have come out to boast / blab / comment about their coveted invititations. Two such folks were painfully predictable with the news. DAVID BECKHAM told RYAN SEACREST about it on a L.A. morning radio show. SIR ELTON JOHN let CTV in Toronto have the news in an exclusive interview. But aside from these two (mandatory) admissions, it seems almost no celebs, rock stars and sports heroes made the cut.

So who has gotten in so far? Other royals of course! (Let's face it: This is the only time the few remaining monarchies left in the world get to do anything meaningful!) First up: Monaco's House of Grimaldi. Yes, Prince Albert will be there with his hottie South African fiancee. Next up: Queen Beatrix of Holland and the Belgian Crown Prince. Check. Representing Scandinavia: The Swedish Crown Princess Victoria. Got it. Margrethe of Denmark is a close friend of Queen Elizabeth's and King Harald of Norway is a distant cousin. They're both in. We're still not sure about the Dukes from Luxembourg and Liechtenstein, but there was one surprise: Attending the British Royal Wedding are two disposed European monarchs! It seems King Constantine of Greece is actually Will's godfather, so he's in. I've never heard of King Michael of Romania, but he got the nod as well.

Who else got in? Lots of royalty from the Middle East. The Saudi King Abdullah bin Abdul Aziz, The Sultan of Oman Qaboos bin Said and Sheik Muzah from Qatar are all coming. But my favorite is Queen Raina from Jordan. (She is fine and I can't wait to see her dress!) The Sultan of Brunei is coming, but Japan's emperor Akihito canceled out of respect for the earthquake / tsunami victims. Finally, the world oldest monarch, the Thai King Bhumibol (83 years old) is in ill health and will be represented by his daughter. NOTE: There are no monarchies in the Western Hemisphere.

Aside from Australia's Prime Minister Julia Gillard, no foreign politicians were invited. (This snub includes the Obamas and the Sarkozys). Instead, Wills and Kate have invited some very ordinary people from the Middleton hometown of Buckleberry. Kate's mailman, grocer, butcher and local pub owner John Haley will all be there. Also of note: one person has turned down the invite. New Zealand rugby star Richie McCaw rudely announced he wants to concentrate on the upcoming World Cup instead. Finally...we saved the best surprise invite for last. Believe it our not, KANYE WEST got a royal invitation to the affair. It turns out Wills is just crazy about the rapper and his music. Let's just hope he leaves the Hennessey bottle at home!

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