Weekly insights into our crazy world.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

FEB 23 WHERE HAVE ALL OF NASA'S MOON ROCKS GONE?

FEB 23 WHERE HAVE ALL OF NASA'S MOON ROCKS GONE?

"Pssst!  I got something out of this world for sale!  It's a Moon Rock.  Yep, it was picked up by an astronaut on the moon, taken to the spaceship, flown back to earth, and now I got it.  It's right here in my overcoat pocket.  Shhh!  Keep it down...this baby is valuable.  Yeah...you can have it.  Half a million Euros!!" Sound too fantastic to be true?  Well, the above conversation really happened to JOSEPH GUTHEINZ JR.  The man known as the "Moon Rock Hunter" has tracked down 77 missing moon rocks and returned the irreplaceable artifacts to their rightful homes in the museums where they belong.  Talk about a superhero!

You must be asking yourself...how does something as valuable as a Moon Rock end up in the pocket of a jacket of a shady dude from the Bronx?  Here's how it all started: During the Apollo 17 Mission, astronaut EUGENE CERNAN (TRIVIA: He's the last man to walk on the moon) snatched up the hugest boulder he could find.   He took it to the module, transported the brick back to Earth and gave it to PRESIDENT NIXON.  Dick loved it!  He loved it so much, he wanted to share "the greatest human accomplishment" with the rest of the world.  So the president ordered the Moon Rock be split up into 185 pieces.  One fragment was sent to each of the 50 US state governors.  The remaining pieces sent to the 135 heads of state Nixon deemed worthy enough of a Moon Rock.  All rocks were mounted on plaques with the respective flag and a brief, pompous statement.

The Honduras Moon Rock.
The problem is lots of chaos has erupted down on earth since the last lunar mission in 1972.  In this forty-year span, many third-world governments have been overthrown, museums have burnt down and lots of bank vaults got looted.  Unfortunately, during these emergencies, the moon rocks...along with many other priceless items...simply disappear.  For example, when Nicolae Ceausescu was abruptly executed in 1989, the dismantling of his palace was rather hectic.  The Romanian Moon Rock became one of the many valuable items of National Heritage that "simply cannot be located" by the new government.  In the last four decades, many other nations in the world who received moon rocks have experienced similar, chaotic transitions of power.  It's sad but true: Most of these fantastic, four-million-years-old, one-of-a-kind stones have been officially declared missing by NASA.  

This really pisses off The Moon Rock Hunter.  Like the famous movie icon Indiana Jones, he lives a double life.  By day, he is a mild-mannered teacher at Alvin Community College in Houston, Texas.  But...at night...he changes into a renegade!  He dawns a cape, cracks a whip and hunts down deposed dictators in muggy Central American jungles...searching for stolen artifacts.  Currently, JOSEPH is busy trying to find Cyprus' Moon Rock.  It seems the artifact has slipped into the hands of a diplomat's son who has been trying to sell it on the black market in Dubai.  He's also on the case of Ireland's lost Moon Rock.  When fire engulfed the observatory where it was held, it was presumed destroyed.  The Moon Rock Hunter knows these babies are tough and can survive any earth fire.  He has tracked it to Finglas Landfill and wants to start digging!

The DUNER BLOG salutes you, MRH!!
Okay...so maybe the Hollywood version of Joseph Gutheinz could be glamorous...but in reality, he just wants people to know the facts about Moon Rocks.  Back in 1972, President Nixon had nothing but goodwill in his heart when he distributed pieces of the moon to fellow world leaders.  The fact that today, 160 of the 270 (60%) Moon Rocks are unaccounted for by NASA is truly a worldwide tragedy.  And let's not just blame dictators in places like far-off Zaire...of the one hundred Moon Rocks distributed to US governors, twenty-four are on NASA's Unaccounted For List.  But don't worry...the Moon Rock Hunter is on the case.   The top of his list is Alaska's missing Moon Rocks.   Seems they disappeared after a curious museum fire.  Joe's tracked them to Arthur Coleman Anderson, the museum curator's stepson, currently living in Corpus Christi.

Keep on Hunting, Moon Rock Hunter!  Keep on Hunting!

No comments:

Post a Comment