APR 27 FAQ'S ABOUT VOLODYMYR ZELENSKY

APR 27  FAQ'S ABOUT VOLODYMYR ZELENSKY

As always after a confusing presidential election, people turn to the DUNER BLOG for clarity. Comedian Volodymyr Zelensky's stunning victory in the Ukrainian elections on Tuesday has got our mailbox stuffed. Let's get started!

Why all the Trump comparisons? Doug, Des Moines. Like the Donald, Volodymyr had never held a public office prior to being elected to the highest public office. Also like the Donald, Volodymyr gained national fame by starring in a TV show. Both portray themselves as heroic political outsiders, trying to drain the swamps in Kiev and Washington of corruption.

What is the premise of the TV show? Leslie, London. Since its premiere in 2015, 'Servant of the People' has topped the Ukrainian Nielson rankings. Like any great sit-com, it has a wacky plot. Mr. Holoborodko is a High-School history teacher in Kiev. His daily rants about the inept rulers of the Ukraine through out the centuries are secretly recorded by his students. They post it online. One thing leads to another, and the lowly instructor becomes a lowly world leader.

What did Zelensky do before this breakthrough role? Kurt, Cologne. Zelensky was born in 1978, when the Ukraine was still part of the USSR. His father was a professor at Kiev University. At age 17, Volodymyr followed suit and enrolled in the law school. On a whim, he auditioned in a talent competition on campus. He didn't win but was invited to join a comedy troupe. As part of Kvartal, he performed extensively and eventually launched a successful Rom-Com film career. His best-known movies are Love in the Big City and 8 First Dates.

Did he really win the election without campaigning? Doris, Laramie. Just like the character in the show, Zelensky got prodded by social media to...you know...actually run for president, in, like, real-life. A new political party, named after the show, was created. Zelensky was instantly nominated. Yet Servant of the People didn't hold any rallies. Rather, they released video-shorts online. They were more stand-up gags than political speeches. Zelensky did attend one debate with corrupt incumbent Petro Poroshenko. He taunted: "There's no jokes about being president." Zelensky replied: "You're the joke. I'm not your opponent. I'm only here as a result of your mistakes."

What does this win say about the state of the Ukraine? Bill, Dubai. Since the fall of the USSR, the once wealthy, 'bread-basket of Europe' has fallen on lean times. State-run industries and wheat production were transferred to a market economy. Oligarchs filled the vacuum, grabbed the profits and the GDP fell. Since 2000, the Ukraine's population has declined  by 10 million people. This figure includes the 3 million folks lost when Russia boldly annexed the Crimea in 2014. Basically, Ukrainians want change and are sick of being known as the poorest and worst-run nation in Europe.

NOTE: According the Ukrainian consulate, it is no longer necessary to use "THE" before "UKRAINE." They also want us to spell "KIEV" as "KYIV." We here at the DUNER BLOG refuse to do either.

APR 19 WHY DO WE LOVE NOTRE DAME CATHEDRAL SO MUCH?

APR 19  WHY DO PEOPLE LOVE NOTRE DAME CATHEDRAL SO MUCH?

Disbelief. Shock. Sorrow. Worry. These are the many emotions we all felt upon first seeing the first photo of Notre Dame Cathedral engulfed in flames. Just about every traveler has a fond memory of Paris' venerable icon. As a twelve-year old, I remember scampering up the stairs in search of a gargoyle. I also fondly remember taking my own son there when he was twelve. Although I have aged considerably between these memorable visits, Notre Dame is...reassuringly...always the same.

This belief is not whimsical. Notre Dame is one tough hombre. It has survived barbarian raids, religious fanatics, the Third Reich, floods and selfie sticks. Prior to the current structure, the divine island in the middle of the Seine River was the site of Roman and Christian temples. Then, in 1163 the Isle-de-la-Cite was chosen for a massive new cathedral. What really got things soaring was a radical new invention called the 'Flying Buttress.' With this ornate support, taller walls could be achieved. In fact, up until the Eiffel Tower in the nineteenth century, Notre Dame was the tallest building in Paris.

Naturally, these grand and ornate walls became the site for many elaborate ceremonies. Bishops crowned French Kings here, including sixteen named Louis. Sometimes, the monarch's rule over Notre Dame was challenged. For example: In 1548, Paris was besieged during the savage Wars of Religion. Persecuted Huguenots sought revenge and overran Paris. They stormed Notre Dame's hallowed gates and smashed everything they could. This group felt all altars, sculptures and paintings were evil idol worship. God commanded them to destroy.

Yet this was nothing compared to the insanity of the French Revolution. During the Reign of Terror, a group called the Cult of Reason admonished all things religious, social and political. After killing the king, they reorganized all of French society. In 1793...or Year Zero as they called it...they renamed the cathedral the "Cult of the Supreme Being.' All 28 gilded statues of the Biblical Kings were hauled off to the guillotine. Yet Notre Dame would recover, proudly hosting the wedding of Napoleon and Josephine Bonaparte a mere decade later. Over the next century, these sturdy walls outlive occupations from both the First and Third Reich.

Sadly, none of these horrific eras is as destructive as a "computer glitch" in the year 2019. Oops! It's still too soon to come to any conclusion. The finest Gendarmes in the Paris police force are currently interviewing 40 people regarding the incident. Meanwhile, the rest of us are still stunned. We're searching through our photo albums, reminiscing and reliving...just like we did when the World Trade Center went up in flames back in 2001. It's true: We humans love our buildings. They keep us united, secure and safe!

APR 13 SUDAN OVERTHOWS OMAR AL-BASHIR

APR 13  SUDAN OVERTHOWS OMAR AL-BASHIR

Remember the famed Arab Spring of 2011? Long-standing dictators in Egypt, Libya and Tunisia were suddenly toppled. Well...it took eight long years...but the Arab Spring has finally reached the distant Sudan. After months of mostly peaceful protests in the capital city of Khartoum, the military finally capitulated on Thursday. After thirty years in power, Omar al-Bashir was arrested. While this event received very little coverage in the American press, we here at the DUNER BLOG are happy this bad dude in no longer in office. Let's review some of his atrocities.

Back in 1989, he came to power the same way he was forced out of power: In a bloodless coup d'état. As "president" his first action was to send his country backward socially by instituting Sharia Law. Amazingly, al-Bashir tried to set the world backward judicially as well. For the last three decades, he has ignored all international laws and Khartoum has been a haven for all sorts of evil terrorists. For example, the murderous Abu Nidal of the PLO was given refuge by al-Bashir. Before moving to Afghanistan, Osama bin Laden lived in a posh condo on al-Mashtal Street. Even Venezuelan terrorist Carlos the Jackal was welcomed with open arms.

Although these are disturbing actions, Omar al-Bashir was just getting warmed up. In the 2000's, he decided he had enough of the minority population living in the desert province of Darfur. Just like Hitler, he executed unknown numbers of people based on their beliefs. It's the worst genocide of the new millennium and it seemed only George Clooney and the International Criminal Court cared. They indicted al-Bashir for war crimes against humanity. Maybe now he can be arraigned.

Back to the turmoil in Khartoum today. Although one tyrant is gone, many fear the new boss will be the same as the old boss. Protesters cheered when it was announced al-Bashir is no longer in power. However, they booed when they were informed his second-in-command General, Awad Ibn Auf, was now in control. After 24 hours, the General resigned and was replaced with Lt. General Burhan. On state TV, he informed the nation of their future. After three months of curfews, the Army will remain in control for two more years. Then, the Sudanese people are promised free and fair elections.

It remains unsure which direction the nation will go. Islamic fundamentalists are strong in the Sudan, but most people must be happy to be leaving the stone-age rule of al -Bashir. People who commit a serious crime don't get stoned to death. They get burned to death. Let's hope the people of the Sudan lift the veil on their closed-off society and let the world in. Although always known as Egypt Junior, the Sudan actually has more ancient pyramids than her Northern neighbor. And instead of just one Nile River, the Sudan has two: The Blue and White Nile Rivers meet spectacularly in the heart of the capital city of Khartoum.

APR 6 REMEMBERING THE DUTCH TULIP CRAZE

APR 6  REMEMBERING THE DUTCH TULIP CRAZE

Spring is in full bloom. As the saying goes: 'April Showers Bring May Flowers.' And here in San Francisco that means tulips. Lots of 'em. How many? Try...like...100,000 of them! As part of a promotion for American Tulip Day, last month famed Union Square was converted into a flower market. Here's the best part: They were all given away for FREE!

It's true: The tulip is a top-seller in flower shops and nurseries. Every year, Americans spend 50 million dollars purchasing a staggering 142,000,000 stems. Not bad for a relative new-comer to the flower market. 500 years ago, tulips were only found in their native area: Turkey and Iran. Things changed in 1554. That's when an Ottoman ambassador brought some tulips to Vienna as a gift to the Holy Roman Emperor. Europeans were mesmerized by the delicate petals and their stunning shades of color.

Eventually, tulip cultivation spread across Central Europe. Owning a tulip became a sort of status symbol. You'd proudly display it on your window sill and enjoy your neighbors' jealous comments. Farmers jumped at the chance to grow the new coveted luxury item. It sold for a lot more than an apple! At the time, Holland enjoyed the highest standard of living in the world. So it came as no surprise that the Dutch decided to spend their extra income on tulips, creating a new industry.

Coincidentally, another era was also being launched in Europe in the 1600's: The Scientific Revolution. Farmers were learning how to cross-breed and create new varieties of crops. This meant that new shades of tulips were being created. As always, people have innate desire to possess the rarest diamond, painting or...tulip. Soon people were paying extraordinary large amounts for the Bizarden. (yellow streaks on a read or violet background) Tulip, the rarest of them all.

What followed was Tulip Mania. Economists call it the first boom/bust in modern history. Behind gin, herrings and cheese, tulips were the #4 export from Holland in 1636. How much did they cost? Well, it's difficult to convert 17th century Dutch florins into Euros, but records indicate a sale of 40 Bizarden bulbs for 100,000 florins. That's around $40,000 in today's money! Sadly, what goes up must come down. With the help of the Bubonic Plague, the Tulip Craze came crashing down in two years' time.

But...just like a tulip bulb...industries can grow again. Last year, The Netherlands produced two billion tulips, surpassing last year's record!