JUNE 30 HOW TO SURVIVE A SHARK ATTACK

JUNE 30 HOW TO SURVIVE A SHARK ATTACK

Beach lovers beware! So far, there have been 15 shark incidents reported in California this year. This already surpassed last year's total. The worst incident occurred last month in San Diego when 35 year-old Leeanne Erickson waded in knee deep water. Suddenly, a juvenile Great White snatched her leg. Thankfully, helpful surfers quickly reacted and saved her. It's not just Southern California that is awash in shark attacks. A North Carolina woman was also nipped as were British tourists in Majorca. To help our readers who swim, here are five ways to survive a shark attack:

DON'T PLAY DEAD. While this will work great when attacked by a bear or a terrorist, sharks are different. They are primarily scavengers and will eat anything. Heck, they've found car tires, Igloo coolers and life preserving jackets in shark bellies. They are not picky and will swallow first and think never.

KEEP YOUR EYES PEELED. Your instincts will tell you to flee. But even Michael Phelps cannot out swim a shark. Instead, keep looking at the beast and slowly tread water in reverse. If you turn and swim away, you instantly become prey. However, if you act tough, the stupid shark will hesitate instead of instantly killing you.

FIGHT BACK. Surfers are often targeted by sharks. Just ask Mick Fanning. At an event two years ago, TV cameras captured him bonking a Great White on the snout. He then paddled to safety. Countless other people have survived this way. Some claw at the eyes and the gills. Although portrayed as mean and heartless in the movies, some sharks are cry-babies and will swim away. NOTE: Don't 'wind up' before hitting, as this doesn't provide any extra force underwater.

LEAVE JEWELRY ON SHORE. Where do you think the term 'Loan Shark' comes from? Kidding. However, sharks are attracted to sparkly and glittery objects. They resemble fish scales, and sharks will think you are their favorite food. Remember, sharks rarely actually consume humans...people are unusual and just resemble their normal prey.

HIDE FROM THE SHARK. The species has survived since the Jurassic Period because of its amazing jaws...not because of intellect. Fool the shark! Skin divers are told to stay close to the boats. If they see a shark, they should put their backs against the hull and stay still. Sharks are impatient and will simply hunt elsewhere.

Okay. Now that your terrified to ever set foot in the ocean again, let's put this in perspective. Although sharks kill humans often in the movies (Once every five minutes in the Sharknado series), it rarely happens in real life. In fact, the chances are 300 million to one you'll die from a shark attack. However, if you happen to drive your car today (the riskiest activity of all) there is a 8,000 to one chance you'll die. Feel better?

JUNE 21 FIDGET SPINNERS CONFISCATED AT GERMAN AIRPORT

JUNE 21 FIDGET SPINNERS CONFISCATED AT GERMAN AIRPORT

Last Friday, authorities at Frankfurt Airport announced the seizure of 39 tons of Fidget Spinners. The dozens of crates holding the dreaded, 'must have' toy of 2017 are currently being crushed into tiny bits in a warehouse in neighboring Mannheim. Customs officials clarified: The confiscated items had loose parts that posed choking habits. Furthermore, the Fidget Spinners lacked proper paperwork and instructions. Normally, defective goods are simply returned to the factory. However, the Chinese manufactures declined. See, the shipping costs outweigh the value of the merchandise. Anyhow...regardless of the motivation...German authorities did what the rest of the world desperately wants: The immediate destruction of all Fidget Spinners worldwide.

Never heard of a Fidget Spinner? Sure...some readers don't interact with kids much or don't live near a Chinatown...so here's a quick description: A disc and a bearing are placed in the center of a three-sided star made of plastic or metal. Kids spin the outer sections while balancing the non-moving part on their thumb, finger, nose, chin, etc. Deluxe spinners can be adjusted for spin time, vibration and (annoying humming) noises. Simple and extremely profitable. Fidget Spinners held all 15 top spots on May's Amazon.com's Toy Sales chart.

However, it's not the spinning part that makes this toy so out-worldly popular. (After all...yo-yo's just spin, but you don't see them in toy stores anymore.) Nope, what makes Fidget Spinners popular is their ability to help children with ADHD concentrate. They alleviate the need for the constant stimulation and allow a kid to pay attention better. One brand bills itself as "Great for ADD, ADHD, Autism & Anxiety." This appeals to many desperate parents. See, Fidget Spinners aren't toys...they are medical intervention. A wondrous stress reliever...For just $5.99!

Sounds great, but let's dig deeper into the studies backing this claim up. They only problem is the lack of any actual scientific research whatsoever. The closest we could find was an article by Cat Bowen, a lifestyle writer at Romper.com. She noted her autistic son improved on math homework when he used a Fidget Spinner. This factoid then entered the Internet and soon became Fake News. Now Middle School teachers nationwide are clamoring to make sense of the situation, as kids claim they are not toys. Sadly, banning them from classrooms has only succeeded in making them more popular with kids!

Back to Frankfort Airport. While the reasoning for the confiscation of the Fidget Spinner was solidly administrative, we can't help but feel the actual motivation was elsewhere. Socialist countries are more protective of children. For example: It's illegal for cartoon characters to hawk sugary cereals on TV ads. Germans view Fidget Spinners as a menace. They understand that exactly the opposite is also occurring. Some ADHD kids succeed while spinning, but the vast majority just stare at the spinner and don't learn at all. Free-market nations like the USA and Mexico are constantly vulnerable to scams like this, and the Germans do not want to fall for it!

JUNE 17 TOP FIVE HANDSOMEST WORLD LEADERS

JUNE 17 TOP FIVE HANDSOMEST WORLD LEADERS

One of the most memorable moments in US politics is the Nixon / Kennedy Presidential Debate in 1960. Prior to the televised event, Nixon enjoyed a double-digit lead in the polls. However, after appearing sweaty and yucky next to the dashing and clean-shaven Kennedy, Dick was defeated. The message: You don't have to be handsome to be a world leader...But it helps! This is proving to be true in 2017 as well. A horde of hunky men have burst onto the international stage. Here's a current Top Five:

#5. Borut Pahor, Slovenia. Melania isn't the only gorgeous creature to come from this tiny Alpine country! Meet Borut. No...he's nothing like the offensive movie character Borat. Just the opposite, actually. Prime Minister Pahor is refined and charming, with crystal clear blue eyes that have ladies' hearts a-flutter all across Central Europe. Although not married, he has a 4 year-old son with his partner, Tanja Pešar. Keep an eye out for Borut in the near future. He thinks Ljubljana would be a perfect neutral site for a Trump / Putin summit. So does Melania.

#4. Jovenel Moïse, Haiti. Not only is he handsome, but Jovenel is also beautiful on the inside. His goal in life is to bring higher standards of living to the poorest nation in the Western Hemisphere. Somehow, he secured billions of dollars in loans. Unlike many other shady Caribbean leaders, Jovenel has NOT embezzled a franc. Instead he's built water purification plants and used solar and wind generators to bring electricity to the slums. Sadly, he has an uphill battle ahead of him. France has never admitted the historical wrongs of their slave past in Haiti and needs to take a more active role in correcting these errors.

#3. Enrique Pena Nieto, Mexico. When elected five years ago, pollsters in Mexico estimated Enrique received a whopping two-thirds of the female vote. (Maybe they thought they were voting for Enrique Iglesias). They love his policies and his
baby-face smile and boyish charm. He needs all the love in Mexico today. Trump has placed him in a lose/lose situation. Standing up to America hurts the Mexican economy. Giving in to America hurts your popularity at home. EPN had only has one year left and Mexican presidents cannot be re-elected. Let's see if anyone else can do a better job balancing this difficult and complex issue..

#2. Emmanuel Marcon, France. During the Clinton impeachment proceedings, all of France wondered what Bill did wrong. See, the

French have very liberal notions in terms of love and marriage. Take Marcon for example. He married his High School Drama teacher...who is 24 years older. They don't have any kids, but two of his three step-children are older than him. None of this mattered to French voters who elected their youngest president ever in May. Last month, he garnered international praise when he scolded Trump for abandoning the Paris Climate Accord. "Make Earth Great Again!" he clamored.

Photos courtesy of TMZ

#1. Justin Trudeau, Canada. C'mon! This one is so obvious. In the two years since assuming the office of Prime Minister, Justin has been on many magazine covers. However...in addition to The Economist, Time and Newsweek...he's also graced the cover of Cosmopolitan, Elle, Woman's Day magazines as well. The Internet is constantly trending some ten-year old shirtless or beach photos of Justin. You get the point. Of course: He's married with kids. Sadly, that still hasn't stopped women from trying to break into Rideau Hall to get a glimpse of his Raven tattoo.

JUNE 10 MAKING SENSE OF THE QATARI CRISIS

JUNE 10 MAKING SENSE OF THE QATARI CRISIS

Seemingly overnight, nine Arab nations have turned on Qatar. They've suspended diplomatic relations and severed all economic ties. Planes are grounded, harbors are silent and people are worried. Why the fuss? Qatar is being called out for supporting terrorism and Iran. As with most complicated international crises, people turn to the DUNER BLOG for answers. Let's get to the mailbox.

Where in world is Qatar? About the size of Maryland, Qatar sticks out like a thumb on the Arabian Peninsula. Surrounded by the Persian Gulf on three sides, it sits on enormous oil and natural gas reserves. The name dates back to ancient Rome, when famed geographer Ptolomy called the land 'Catara.'

Why is Qatar in trouble? For the last decade, the Arab community has accused Qatar of supporting the Muslim Brotherhood. This century-old organization originally supported a pan-Arab state, but has recently wavered toward Islamic fundamentalism. Saudi Arabia and the UAE label them a terrorist organization. However, the straw that broke the camel's back was a recent post by the Qatari Emir Sheikh Tamim al Hamad al Thani. He showed his support of hated economic and religious rival Iran. He called them an 'Islamic Power' and criticized US policies toward Tehran. That's a big "No-no" for a Sunni nation, even if it is true..

What are the hacking allegations? As always these days, any international story must involve Russian hackers. The Emir says he never issued any Pro-Iran statements. He blames...wait for it...Russian hackers for the Fake News. While this seems preposterous, Internet pirates do have a reputation for stirring up trouble and kicking hornet's nests whenever possible. Current congressional hearings in the US Congress are discovering that direct links to anything are not easy to find.

Isn't Qatar rich enough to ride this out? With a per-capita income of $147,000 tiny Qatar is the wealthiest nation on earth. It's also the most reliant on foreign labor. Native Qataris are a minority in their own state, only comprising 12% of the population. These uber-rich people have the fantastic financial reserves will not be rationing food. However, it's the other 88% that is cause for worry. The Pakistani and Bangladeshi guest workers will be hit the hardest.

What are the global impacts? Qatar is an OPEC member, so the embargo has already resulted in a small spike in petroleum prices worldwide. Otherwise, the impacts will be largely symbolic. On one hand, this is yet another move in the endless chess game between Sunni and Shi'ite states in the Persian Gulf. On the other hand, it is one of the few times any Islamic state has acted economically against a terrorist-supporting nation. This is important. Until the Islamic world ends its cultural acceptance of suicide bombings as 'part of life,' the rest of the world will be on constant red alert

JUNE 3 TOP FIVE COASTAL DRIVES WORLDWIDE

JUNE 3 TOP FIVE COASTAL DRIVES WORLDWIDE

This year, California experienced its rainiest year in 122 years of record keeping. This has resulted in mudslides all over the Golden State. The most notable is on the coast near Big Sur. Just how big is the slide? The USGS estimates that 13 acres of coastline have been created by the slide, totaling in 71 million cubic feet of dirt. Sadly, famed Highway #1 will be closed for a year as Caltrans tries to dig out 80 feet of mud on the roadway. This inspired us at the DUNER BLOG to rank the five best shoreline drives NOT closed this summer:

#5. Ruta #1, Chile. Similar to California's Route #1, this Chilean Highway hugs the jagged Pacific coastline in dramatic fashion. It tallies a whopping 438 kilometers of spectacular views. What separates this stretch of road from others is the amazing spectrum of natural wonders the driver encounters. It begins in the Atacama, the world's driest desert, which looks more like the moon than earth. Along the way, you'll see pink sand dunes, hot springs, geysers on one side of the road and stunning steep cliffs and long sandy beaches on the other.

#4. Great Ocean Road, Australia. When Aussie soldiers returned home from the Great War, the government put them to work building this lengthy coastal highway. They dedicated it to the soldiers who didn't make it home...making the Great Ocean Road the largest war memorial on earth. To accomplish this, workers carved out a thin strip of road from the 500-foot high ocean cliffs. The highlight is the famous 12 Apostles limestone foundations. Keep your eyes peeled for wildlife as well. Anteaters, kangaroos, parrots and penguins complete a fantastic array of exotic animals.

#3. The Road to Hana, Hawaii. Although only 52 miles long, this road feels much, much longer. That's because there are 600 hairpins turns and 54 one-lane bridges to slow you down tremendously. But that's a good thing. Otherwise, you might miss the ten waterfalls, thousand-foot cliff drops and the tiny coves of gorgeous black sand beaches. Also impressive is the lush vegetation that covers parts of the road in a fragrant canopy. It takes around three hours to drive to the town of Hana. Do the math: Your average speed is 13 miles per hour.

#2. Overseas Highway, Florida. Originally built for trains by an entrepreneur way back in 1910, the goal was to connect 18 islands off the southernmost tip of Florida. Then, in 1935 the Labor Day Hurricane washed away 30 miles of the railway line. When restored, the tracks were removed and replaced with highway. Today, there are 42 separate bridges, the longest being the Seven-Mile Bridge at Marathon. It's appeared in many movies, including Mission Impossible, Fast & the Furious and in 007: License to Kill. All in all, it takes five hours to drive the entire 113 miles. Try to do it at sunset, when a unique spectrum of pink, purple and orange fill the sky.

#1. Amalfi Coast Road, Italy. Clocking in at the top spot is State Route #163 which runs from Sorrento to Salerno on Italy's rugged Amalfi Coast. Originally constructed by ancient Romans, the highway today has two lanes. If you're scared of heights, drive in the Northern direction. Otherwise, you car door will be inches away from 1,000 foot cliffs with only a tiny metal railing separating you and the Mediterranean Sea way below. Also thrilling are the daredevil Italian motorists, who'll speed and brake continuously. Not surprisingly, the Amalfi Coast Road has also been in dozens of movies (the best being Bogart's Beat the Devil) and even video games (Gran Turismo 4). Both display the road's precarious curves with little to separate you from the craggy sea boulders below. Not for the fainthearted!